Made a wish.

Made a wish and let it float off in the wind
It’s such a simple thing
To find myself hoping again

And I know, I know that I am afraid
But it’s not of my pain
It’s how I lost the sight in the beauty remaining in the day

So I go on these arteries you call roads
Oh, it’s such a simple need
For my heart to feel safe and at home

Yes, I know
Yeah, I fucking know!
That I am afraid
But it’s not of my pain
It’s how you look at me with fear
In your stern gaze

Have I not fought and survived?
Just to be set apart from you?
They taught me how to fear
My own mind
And I have to forgive them too?
Oh God, what if I can’t make peace?

Is this the weakness that you see?
When I bled for you
Who bled for me?
But it wasn’t enough red it seems

Ah!

Look at me, I'm the trauma under your bed
Told too angry for you men
I violent in the head
Now shush

They shushed my sobs
And muzzled me
Told me I was
A bad, bad thing
Why do I have to be better than this?
But if I wanna save myself I can’t
Put more red on these hands!

So I go to find myself some peace
But not for you, for me
I just wanna better home

But you should know
I won’t hurt myself again
By treating you as you treated me then
And I wish for you the same my friend

And I know that I am afraid
But I won’t again
Put on my war paint!
'Cause I'm dealing with my pain
And I wish for you the same
Oh we both made too much red

And it won’t make me less afraid
But I won’t put on my war paint
'Cause hurting you don’t make it
Easier on me

(Go find yourself some peace)